Happy New Year!

Dear Friends,
Year after year, I welcome the New Year by resuming my commitments, since I always have something that I need to do less or more of. But this first day of January, instead of making the same old new promises and plans, I decided to empty my bucket list, as soon as possible, before my determination and enthusiasm waltz down the slippery road of idleness.  
As silly as it sounds, I'm giving up my "unalienable right" to pursue happiness because now, I know for sure that I'll never be happy, although I'm adept at having a good time (I'm not even American, what was I doing following their constitution, FGS)! 
An important component of happiness is peace. Unfortunately, due to certain kismet malfunction and personal failure, I will never be at peace with myself, but I'm willing to reconcile with my lot.
From now on, my independence consists of Life and Liberty! I'm leaving the right to chase dreams to those who have strong legs and clear visions. 
Let the good times roll, is my resolution for the next twelve months, might as well remain in my comfort zone! 

Holiday Insight!

Dear Friends,

I can't believe I stayed away from my blog for so long! Not that I didn't have anything noteworthy to say, I simply didn't have the time to share. Or, as a wise man once said, it's not a matter of time, but priority. 

Opération Décoration - done! 
Housewarming and Birthday Parties - done! 
Chanukah, Christmas and Kwanzaa Cheers - done! 

Last night, I returned to my solitude by the lake, not only to detox my body, but also to reset my mind. 
God Bless all the traditions and celebrations, they do take a toll on me. 
Aside from a few unwelcome pounds and hangovers, I also gained a valuable insight; I will never be a full fledged, published author, because I'm definitely a social animal.

Lonely must be the life of real writers! 

It is a Wonderful Profession!

Dear Friends,  
Last week, I saw a charming play called, It's a Wonderful Life. Could never sit throughout the movie, but thoroughly enjoyed VOS production in Cobourg. It made me think of my own purpose in life. Unlike George Bailey, I haven't saved anyone's life, altered the course of anyone's life, or helped anyone make a life-changing decision. Unless my granddaughters do one of the above, I'll say my birth has been to no purpose. For the past sixty years, I've been an extra, in the background. 
Today, however, I arrived at a different conclusion. As tired and stressed as I am, as absent-minded and irritable as I am, I can't help but marvel at my students' progress, socially, emotionally and academically. Every piece of work they produce, every little problem they solve, every "Bonjour Madame" in the morning, and every hug at the end of the day proves to me that it is a wonderful life! After all, grade one is a big adjustment. My purpose in life, is to make it easier and merrier, both for my students and their parents! 
Of course, with only 12 days left to the finish line (with two weeks Christmas break in the middle), the tunnel is inundated with light, or as we say in Farsi, my quail is singing like a rooster!

Amen!

Dear Friends,
As I'm watching the bare, flat landscape that lies between Cobourg and Toronto rush by me, I can't help but compare the speed at which the train is moving to the passage of time, in general. Already into the eight day of December, already 6 weeks of teaching behind me! So much has happened in the past few months; sell one property, only to buy another; retire, only to go back to work, go to the lake, only to return to the city. Suddenly I realize that it's still my year — the year of the Wood Horse! I have two more months to make my mark, as if I haven't already done enough! I made us proud, worked hard at "running free, changing directions with small shifts in the wind and switching gears quickly".
Did I design my life to live up to my sign's characteristics, or did the ever shifting nature of Wood Horse ran my life? Either way, I should stop believing in astrology as the year of Wood Ram promises to be "a demanding and challenging year for the horse," full of intensity, quick changes and adversity!
As we say in Farsi, may God take pity on me!  

Life Under Duress!

Dear Friends,
Finally this morning, I got to see my new neighbourhood in the daylight, as for the past few days, I've been going to work in the dark, returning home in the dark. The tour of the village set me back $$$! This is my rationale, and I'm sticking to it! 
As a general rule, I try to stay away from public transportation. Since for number of years, I used my legs, the faithful number 11, to take me to work and beyond, I had forgotten what moving with the masses looked like; yawning, eating, spilling coffee, reading, sleeping, farting, knitting, applying foundation and mascara, and fiddling with electronics. All we need to make public transportation a real home away from home, are a few toilet bowls. I'm old-fashioned, I sit and stare at people, unless there is an unstable person on board, yelling and swearing, in which case I close my eyes and start praying! On numerous occasions I had to get off the train, or the bus, to shield myself from someone's insanity. My commute is always followed by NOISE! Noisy students in the morning, noisy fridge, fan and train that passes by my window, at night. 
Now, if this body-under-duress doesn't deserve a few new outfits, I don't know what does!

Liberty Village

Dear  Friends,
Thirty-four years ago yesterday, I woke up in a strange bed, in unfamiliar surroundings, just like I did yesterday morning. Except, this time, it was by choice. Since my first night in Canada, November 28, 1980, I've lost my softness, faith, innocence and trust. In the process, I've gained two degrees, a career, two divorces, a pension, and two properties. Nothing to grieve, nothing to celebrate, merely an exchange of goods.
As much as waking up far from my revolution-ridden homeland meant deliverance, waking up in Liberty Village, over three decades later, felt more like real freedom. In order to honour the cosmic coincidence, for a year, I'm going to live as if I have only one year to live. Of course, such insane modus operandi will justify extravagance and excuse out-of-character behaviour, such as giving up making promises or commitments. I'll be a mood worshiper, I'll go where my mood takes me, I'll eat, do and buy what my mood tells me.
According to an ancient Turkish folk character, Nasr-Al-Deen, good judgement comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgement. So, let the games begin!

Romance

Dear Friends,
Many, many years ago, a refined, wise woman (God bless her soul) told a bunch of not-so-young, but green women, that the secret to happiness was to always have something to look forward to. 
The other day, I read an article in Psychology Today (November/December 2014) that touched on the same concept, calling it "anchoring yourself in the future."
As much as I look forward to spending weekends in Cobourg, and visiting my family and friends in Toronto, I've come to realize that tough times do indeed require desperate measures (we are still talking about me surviving my longterm teaching assignment in the heart of winter)! 
What I need, I believe, is a short-term, part-time Romance! Something to take my mind off my predicament, "an investment in, a distraction through, an excitement about something ahead".
Thus, tonight, I walked into my bar with shopper's eye, as we say in Farsi. The usual Sunday prospects were present; the gigolo wannabe with a criminal record, the retired schoolteacher with vulgar genes, the awfully young-looking old man with different kind of vulgar jeans, the needy dog-sitter with puppy eyes and the overweight bon vivant car salesman. 
Your chances of finding romance in this joint, I whispered to myself, is as much as finding a needle in a haystack. 
So, I went ahead, and bought myself a studio, in a vibrant, cool area in Toronto! 
Home decorating always makes me happy, especially when it presents challenges. The simple act of jotting down what needs to be bought, has reenergized this old body and mind. 
Fully understanding that by the time I put the finishing touches on my masterpiece, I'll have to rent it out and move back to Cobourg, for now, I'm anchoring myself in romancing my new 420 Sq. Ft. home!