Love at your convenience

Dear Friends,

My definition of love is twisted, and that explains why I've lived most of my adult life alone.

I need a fellow who goes that extra mile (at least once), or commits one insane act for me, not at his convenience, but at my unreasonable request.

I invited my ex-husband to join me and our granddaughters for a sleepover, making it very clear that I "needed" him. He replied, " The flight is too expensive."

Now, we are talking about a man who has made a career out of woeing me, leaving all the women in my family "envious".

"Love at your convenience!" I erased his texts and continued to scrub my tiny apartment. 

I just wanted our last sleepover to be perfect. I wanted to take the girls to the pool, the discovery centre, the ice cream parlour. Somehow, I didn't see myself doing all that alone, in a pouring rain. I'm always anxious about their safety. And perhaps, I needed their grandfather for emotional support. He called a few times, concerned. He must've left ten messages. As if I had a free hand to pick up the phone! 

Girls know how to have fun! We did everything on the agenda, except swim in the pool, but playing in the bathtub was as much fun. 

I repaid my ex-husband by FaceTime and a few cute pictures, because that's just the kind of person I am, full of surprises! 

It's so hard to give to good times. Most of us save our money, energy or heroic acts for disasters. Had I asked my X to come to my deathbed, he would've taken the first flight out of Philly. 

What astonishes me is that after 42 years, I'm still hoping to be surprised!!!!! Duh Lili, duh!